Celebrations at the US embassy

EW News reported yesterday that nearly 70 grenades had been stolen from a vehicle transporting them to a military base in Pretoria. The fact that they were taken while the 'guard' was asleep is burning to be made fun at - but I will resist. Its just too easy. 

What is really troubling me is why someone would want that many grenades in the first place. Why not just two or three? Even the best suicide bombers would suffice with eight (or so i'm told). And heaven forbid they were stolen for this purpose... what target could possibly be deserving of an attack? This being peace loving South Africa and all.

Using historical trends as my only source of data -  I determined it would be the United States embassy. Its a monster of a building situated on the corner of Rivonia and Sandton Drive. The building oozes confidence and gives the impression of being a fortress of sorts. American flags fly proudly as a constant reminder to all who dare look at her.

I drive past the embassy every day on the way to work. Rivonia road tends to form a massive traffic jam outside its gates so I have spent a fair amount of time scrutinizing its security (in only the most innocent of ways). If an attack were to occur on that particular target one dare not think what the repercussions would be. 

Drone strikes aside it would make morning traffic even more nightmarish than it already is. In all the possible blast situations that I have played out in my head (in only the most innocent of ways), their is not one where Rivonia road isn't harmed. Potholes are one thing, having to avoid blast craters is something completely different.

Thankfully however, reality does not always align with my twisted imagination. If so, South Africa's position in the international community would have been dealt a crippling blow yesterday - as well as having made me late for work. 

Instead, it was later reported that the grenades were not in fact explosives but rather pyrotechnic devices that, 'simply illuminate when ignited'.  It is unclear whether or not this is a PR spin to try and quash public fear or if the SA military was genuinely robbed of its fireworks collection. Either way a collective sigh was released across the country.

And in the US embassy they prepared for a party, hot dogs were grilled and beers opened. The traditional fourth of July celebration was in full swing. I'm told the fireworks display was better than ever.